Social Media Approval and Validation? I’m Over It and You Should be Too!

Posted on Posted in Career

Let me warn you, full rant ahead.  I despise attention seeking people who turn to Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat or whateva (yes whateva) for validation.  Whether it’s subliminal but not so subliminal messages to your “friends”, “10 selfies a week,” “Please pray for me weekly post,” the “Facebook Like or I’ll Die syndrome, whatever it is—-I. Am.Over. It.

If you make frequent posts about yourself in an attempt to attract likes and comments that fuel YOUR beliefs about what you’re doing you may be a Narcissists–Yep, I said it and shout out to the expert over at Forbes  for validating this goodness.

If two hours have passed and no one has “liked” your Facebook status update and you call a friend to vent, you’re in deeper trouble (Sadly, I received such a call from a friend).

Kandia Johnson

And, if you’re compelled to post a passive aggressive status update that no one has liked something you posted earlier or no one supports your 3rd new business of the year–-I really suggest you step away from the computer, take a 72-hour digital detox and seek professional help.

geralt / Pixabay

Right now you’re probably saying to yourself, “Who does she think she is?” Well, I’m no clinical psychologist, but I don’t need to be an expert to recognize that people sitting around waiting for approval on social media need to get their life together.

I’ve heard one too many “war stories” about people, who are way over the age of maturity, waiting on pins and needles for a compliment. Again, I’m over it.

Look, we all need attention. But damn you, Mark Zuckerberg, this “Facebook like” obsession is a gift and a curse. I swear this social media thing has shown me the dark side of some people who I really thought had their ish together.

I’ll be the first to admit, I’ve been guilty on several occasions. You post a picture, video, quote or whatever, and it falls upon deaf ears.

But I’ve learned about the real cost of distractions.

I’ve learned that comparing myself to other people’s perfectly curated lives on social media, keeps me from focusing on my own creating my own opportunities. It keeps me emotionally stuck. And ultimately it keeps me from doing work that matters. 

I’ve learned that social media captures a moment, not a lifetime. 

Related:  5 Reasons Why You’re Feeling Stuck (and Tips for Getting Your Life Back on Track )

So at some point, you have to acknowledge that there may be some other issues going on in your life that need to be addressed and seek help, seriously (I say this with the most empathetic smile).

It’s insane for anyone to allow a Facebook Like to determine their self-worth. What if no one ever liked your posts? Would you change the direction of your life? Would you change your goals or what you do every day? Wait, I just felt really sad–because a lot of you would. Say it with me: “A Facebook or Instagram Like is not my legacy.”

Chances are if you’re struggling to execute one of your  ideas–you’re probably spending too much time, consuming and not creating.

Social Media Validation

Step away from the computer. Take some time to explore the world or your very own backyard. Surround yourself with people who don’t look like you or like the same things you like. Check your motives and check the intentions of your actions. Do something while you feel afraid because that’s when the magic happens. And for God’s sake, keep some things to yourself.

When you take away the pretty package that you’ve curated for Instagram, who are you? If you couldn’t capture a moment for the Instagram or Snapchat–would you do it?

I know some pretty amazing people–who are so consumed with seeking attention from friends and strangers or being in everyone else’s business that they can’t focus on their day to day life.  Get it together people, because your days are numbered.

Seriously, every now and then ask yourself:  Are you building a legacy that will outlive you?  Are you creating generational wealth for your family? Because at the end of the day that’s what matters for all of us.

Listen y’all, let’s face it, death is inevitable. No one is going to stand up at your funeral and talk about how many “likes” you got. No one is going to talk about how you took the best selfie ever.  But they will talk about how you made people feel. They will talk about the things you’ve created to make the world better. And the actions you took to inspire others and create your own lane for success. So what do you really want to be known for? 

Okay, rant OVER! Whew— that feels better! Okay back to our regularly scheduled program of empowering you to carve your own path to success!

Peace, Love and Lessons y’all! 


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One thought on “Social Media Approval and Validation? I’m Over It and You Should be Too!

  1. Amen Sista!!! I must admit at some point I was completely consumed with Facebook. I literally had to detox. I was constantly comparing myself to what I was seeing on Facebook. By being constantly bombarded by images, it made me doubt myself and lose focus. I must say after logging out I became more focus and confident. I now am learning to take control and not let things take control over me…

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